In psychology we learned of a concept called 'missattribution of arousal." I think I'm starting to understand it. I have tons of anxiety. Bundles, heaps, gaggles, and boxes of anxiety. I have been under the impression that it is due to this new girl, BUT, I have one big fucking other source of anxiety; THE RETURN TO CLASSES. I have a midterm on Friday, a calc problem set due on wednesday, applications for research opprotunities, and I am late in calling an employer for a summer job. I AM FRICKING SWAMPED. So I have probably been a little melodramatic and missattributing this arousal to her rather than the more obvious source of the rest of my life :P
Sadly though that doesn't mean I'm not anxious over her at all. I still am, but it's more of one more fucking cherry on the cake of pain. I would much rather not have to deal with her at all; and by "deal" I mean worry about the things I worry about. I mean if we were together and happy, I honestly doubt I'd be worrying. But, such is life. I am still trying to woo her and will continue to at this point in time. However, I still feel like she is no longer interested. If I still feel like this after pi day, I'm done. My self esteem can only take so much patience. Her loss.
I would love to meet a girl, for once, that can actually lower my stress.
