So my ex-girlfriend, who I will name "the girl" to fit with the theme of mysterious adventure and to get rid of any emotional attachment to her name, was originally my best friend before we went out. We would talk on the phone every night. She told me that she still wanted to be my best friend after the break up. I felt like I really did want to stay friends because not only did she mean a lot to me, she made me a better person and taught me how not to lie, not to worry, and to enjoy life. Now whenever I try to talk to her I just feel like I am setting myself up for disapointment.
I havent been talking to her for a month and my friend thinks it's a good idea to try and build a friendship slowly now by texting her once in a while. So I tried. After 3 days she has not texted me back. How the hell am I supposed to build a relationship with someone who will not even text me back one word to acknowledge the fact that she got my text. I will never be able to build up to a phone conversation because I will never be able to get her to call me. She says she doesn't like texting, but I feel like that isn't an excuse. If she cared she would go out of her way to ignore this unreasonable pet peive to at least text me one word. If she can't text me one fucking word, she doesn't care. Plain and simple. At least that's my opinion. My friend is free to despute me if she really wants to.
Every time I build up enough courage to reach out to her I leave myself extremely vulnerable. So when I get dissapointed, which is pretty much every fucking time, it hurts me emotionally even more that the last. Every time I try to rebuild our friendship it leaves me a little more broken. It is this very reason why I feel like I should stop trying. Forget her. Cut her off from my life. She stole a part of me when she left me at the terminal and I don't fucking want to give her more because that's all that is happening. Not only am I lost in my adventure, but now I am losing myself and my mind. I don't know how much more dissapointment I can take.
I have friends that aren't her. They care about me and are there for me. I don't need her.
