She texted me. She actually texted me today. I was going about my daily routine when her name popped into my phone. I don't usually get texts so to see her name was an extra surprise. She was putting her adventure aside to take a break from all the stress and monotony... and talk to me. As soon as I read the text and started to reply my heart started beating out of my chest. I was so nervous. I have been in many plays and this is the most stage fright I have experienced in my entire life :P. We had a simple conversation about what we were doing and we exchanged jokes. She seemed happy. I am actually glad. However, mid conversation I realized that the one day she chose to text me happened to be what would have been our monthiversery if that's a word. Being a little upset over the choice of day I decide to remind her of that so I am not the only one that is forced to think about it. Luckily she did not get upset. She just apologized for picking today. I am glad for that as well. We said goodbye and told the other person that we were excited to so each other during the Christmas holidays and that was the end.
Now I know that sounds like an extremely mundane conversation, but it means a lot to me. I'm truly happy that we are talking again. However, my heart was racing after and I didn't want to be alone. I might be this fragile after one conversation, but I know that this was definitely better than no conversation at all. I would rather feel this way and talk to her than feel safe and not talk to her at all because I know that after every conversation we have it will be a little easier and this feeling will go away. I can do this. For her and for myself.
